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CAPTION CONTEST #4

 

Many Thanks to all that entered!

Here are the winners

Prizes are on their way!

 


THE TOP 10 WINNERS


1."He was found in the middle of the lake. The sergeant didn't want to leave him there

because snowman is an island"

 

2."It's in the Rangers manual, 'Rules of Ranging' number 26, "After a winter debacle,

a Ranger will build a snowman to make himself feel better"

If you Brits don't believe me, then ask Major Rogers himself!!!!!!!!"

 

3."The new guy says he's committed, but I betcha he's gone by mid-March"

many thanks to Treefrog Treasures for picking this winner

 

4."The Colonel says if his hat isn't back in his tent in 5 minutes, he going to come looking for it..."

many thanks to SIERRA TOY SOLDIER for picking this winner

 

5.""No, I said, "Make use of the Snow ...men", not make Snowmen!"

many thanks to SIERRA TOY SOLDIER for picking this winner

 

6."So I was telling these Rangers here, you have to keep an eye out for spy's and such."

many thanks to Treefrog Treasures for picking this winner

 

7."Sir, I tried to tell you that two hours out on picket duty is just TOO DAMNED LONG!"

many thanks to March Through Times for picking this winner

 

8."Put another log on the fire. Johnston froze up again"

many thanks to Troops of Time for picking this winner

 

9."Shame 'Head and Shoulders' won't be invented for another 200 years,

that bloke could sure use it!"

many thanks to Troops of Time for picking this winner

 

 

10."FROSTY THE RANGER"

 

Frosty the Ranger

 Was a jolly happy soul

with a corncob pipe and a button nose

And two eyes made of coal

 

Frosty the Ranger

Is a fairytale they say

He was made of snow

But the soldiers Know

How he came to life one day

 

There must have been some magic

In that old tricorne hat they found

For when they placed it on his head

He began to fire his musket around

 

Frosty the Ranger

Was alive as he could be

And the soldiers say

He could load and fire

Just the same as you and me

 

Frosty the Ranger

Knew the French were close that day

So he said let's run

And we'll have some fun

And blow them all away

 

Down to Fort Carillon

With a musket in his hand

Running here and there all around the land

Firing as fast as he can

 

He led them down to Fort Carillon

Right to the French breast works

And he only paused a moment when he heard Abercrombie holler "Frontal Assault"

And led men to their graves

 

Frosty the Ranger

Had to hurry back this way

But he waved goodbye

Saying don't you cry

"French, We'll be back again some day!"

 

Thumpety thump thump

Thumpety thump thump

Look at Frosty go

Thumpety thump thump

Thumpety thump thump

He'll be back in 59'

"

many thanks to March Through Times for picking this winner

 

 




The Entries


"Don't Look now, but here's that new recruit. Its creepy the way he's always smiling." July 3rd

 

"Any Further away from this fire and you'd be frozen in this colJuly 3rd

 

"So I was telling these Rangers here, you have to keep an eye out for spy's and such."  July 3rd

 

"Damn Fire went out!- Ice coffee anyone?"   July 5th

 

"Whatever you guys do, don't bring that thing into the camp, my father used to tell me, "Beware of

Indians bearing gifts" July 5th

 

"Heres the plan you guys, I was watching Beau Geste on TNT the other night, and since we're low

on soldiers, we'll make a lot of snow men and dress them in Ranger's uniforms to fool the Indians" July 5th

 

"I got a "frosty" feeling about this whole situation" July 5th

 

"Try not to stare at the new guy even though he seems a little ...flaky" July 7th

 

"Aw, man, he didn't say "Happy Birthday"! Let's try the Major's hat this time....." July 7th

 

"He was found in the middle of the lake. The sergeant didn't want to leave him there

because snowman is an island" July 7th

 

"The Colonel says if his hat isn't back in his tent in 5 minutes, he going to come looking for it..." July 7th

 

"I think it's about time I went and relieved Smithers on guard duty" July 7th

 

"Don't look now, but I'm sure that snowman just moved!" July 7th

 

"That new chap has certainly got bad dandruff" July 7th

 

"There must have been some magic in that old flintlock they say. For when they placed it in

his hands some French and injuns he did "sleigh"" July 7th

 

"This is my carrot nose!! This is my gun!! This one tastes good with everything!!

This one is just impossible to use cuz I got #@%&! sticks for arms" July 7th

 

"The new guy says he's committed, but I betcha he's gone by mid-March" July 7th

 

"Customer coming boys, look sharp!" July 7th

 

"Yoo hoo guys I'm over here!" July 7th

 

"Try not to look at him when he does that" July 7th

 

"Beats me where that last carrot got to" July 7th

 

"Shame 'Head and Shoulders' won't be inented for another 200 years,

that bloke could sure use it!" July 7th

 

"Damn, the fires going out..... anyone know what happened to the last of the coal?" July 7th

 

"That fat guy with the long white beard coming up the hill in the red suit

Can't possibly be Major Rogers replacement? Looks more like one of those

French voyageurs!" July 8th

 

"Stop your bellyaching, August is the warmest month up here" July 8th

 

"Sir, I tried to tell you that two hours out on picket duty is just TOO DAMNED LONG!" July 8th

 

"It's in the Rangers manual, 'Rules of Ranging' number 26, "After a winter debacle,

a Ranger will build a snowman to make himself feel better"

If you Brits don't believe me, then ask Major Rogers himself!!!!!!!!" July 9th

 

"They said to me he was a COOL guy.....but I didn't think he was so COOL" July 9th

 

"Put another log on the fire. Johnston froze up again" July 9th

 

"The Snowman Corps went down as Washington's biggest blunder when only one

soldier found his way into the enemy camp" July 9th

 

"Did you guys hear something?" July 9th

 

"Did I have too much rum last night or has that deer got a red nose?" July 9th

 

"Boy!! That  grizzly bear looks mean and hungry. Think he wants some coffee?" July 9th

 

"Uh-oh!! I do not like the way that bear is looking at our snowman" July 9th

 

"Darn, they're going to attack!! I thought we fooled the Indians into thinking there was 5 of us!!" July 9th

 

"Sir, I tried to tell you that two hours picket duty

is just TOO DAMNED LONG!" July 9th

 

"Stop your bellyaching, August is the warmest month up here" July 9th

 

"Sure, come to America.

See the sights.

Have an adventure...#@&? Recruiter" July 14th

 

"Who do you think drank all our rum?" July 14th

 

"Why is Santa laughing at us?" July 14th

 

"Join the army they said! Travel the world they said! Meet lots of interesting people they said!

They said nothing about freezing our balls off

and making snowmen for the officers Christmas party!" July 14th

 

"The recruiting party had trouble convincing the officer that the new recruit had

accepted the King's shilling!" July 14th

 

"No, I said, "Make use of the Snow ...men", not make Snowmen!" July 14th

 

"This ain't Sussex, Jack!" July 14th

 

"Is it me, or did we leave Johnson on sentry duty for too long?" July 14th

 

"Wait a minute..... that's not Johnson" July 14th

 

One Ranger looks to the other "man, they'll put a red coat on anything nowadays" July 14th

 

 

"Right mates, as soon as everyone's asleep, I get first dibs on Snowballs.....

mmmmmmm Snowballs, you treat me so fine" July 24th

 

"Bollocks! The boss is coming. I hope you stashed that whacky tobaccy in that

snowman good and proper" July 24th

 

"My people laughed at me. They said my disguise wouldn't work. As soon as these pale-faces sllep,

it's scalpy scalpy time. Then, will my people honour the great Snow Bunny of

the White Plains" July 24th

 

"What!!? They returned the Snowman because they didn't like our gift?

There's a term for that isn't there?" July 24th

 

"Dammit, I need to wee. If I do, the bottom of this awesome disguise will melt

and I'm screwed" July 24th

 

"And the winner of this week's snow sculpture is............." July 24th

 

"When I count 3 Mariner, you push Pvt Snowflake in the blender, Towne, you pour in

the tequila, McNabb salts up the glasses and I'll cut the limes.

Crofton you get ready with the Margarita mix.....Crofton?? .. CROFTON!!!!" July 24th

 

"As soon as the Colonel's pet nods off, I say we bust out of here, sneak down to the

Flintlock Tavern and party like its 1799!" July 24th

 

"At that awkward moment the men realized the sentry was not made of Marshmallows

as they had been led to believe. The invention of the S'More would have to wait another 200yrs" July 24th

 

"Guys, I have this great idea. I'm gonna call it Starbucks and.........." July 24th

 

"If John had to sculpt us as winter figures at least he could have come up with a

bigger fire!" July 24th

 

"All I know is that spring will wipe that damn smirk right off his face!" July 24th

 

"So much for background checks!" July 24th

 

"Hey you! Keep your carrot out of our business" July 24th

 

"Hey look. Frosty looks slushed" July 24th

 

"FROSTY THE RANGER"

 

Frosty the Ranger

 Was a jolly happy soul

with a corncob pipe and a button nose

And two eyes made of coal

 

Frosty the Ranger

Is a fairytale they say

He was made of snow

But the soldiers Know

How he came to life one day

 

There must have been some magic

In that old tricorne hat they found

For when they placed it on his head

He began to fire his musket around

 

Frosty the Ranger

Was alive as he could be

And the soldiers say

He could load and fire

Just the same as you and me

 

Frosty the Ranger

Knew the French were close that day

So he said let's run

And we'll have some fun

And blow them all away

 

Down to Fort Carillon

With a musket in his hand

Running here and there all around the land

Firing as fast as he can

 

He led them down to Fort Carillon

Right to the French breast works

And he only paused a moment when he heard Abercrombie holler "Frontal Assault"

And led men to their graves

 

Frosty the Ranger

Had to hurry back this way

But he waved goodbye

Saying don't you cry

"French, We'll be back again some day!"

 

Thumpety thump thump

Thumpety thump thump

Look at Frosty go

Thumpety thump thump

Thumpety thump thump

He'll be back in 59'   

 July 31st

 

 

 

 

 

check out the other Caption Contests for extra laughs!

CAPTION CONTEST #1

 

CAPTION CONTEST #2

 

CAPTION CONTEST #3

 

CAPTION CONTEST #5


CAPTION CONTEST #6


CAPTION CONTEST #7


CAPTION CONTEST #8


CAPTION CONTEST #9


CAPTION CONTEST #10


CAPTION CONTEST #11


CAPTION CONTEST #12


CAPTION CONTEST #14


CAPTION CONTEST #15




 



JOHN JENKINS DESIGNS
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HONG KONG
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